Don't Forget Underwear

I didn’t know what to bring to the hospital. I read so many lists and watched videos of people packing their hospital bag. It seemed like a lot of unnecessary shit. So, if you are about to have a baby here is a list of what I took to the hospital and why. Maybe it can help you either limit the shit you pack or remind you to take something you’ll need.

Clothes - I packed a pair of leggings, a comfortable and kind of loose shirt, my favorite Star Wars socks, slippers, a robe, and a ton of cotton high waisted granny panties. I picked leggings and a comfortable shirt to come home in because I had no idea what kind of shape my body would be in. I saw pictures of women who would leave still looking pregnant, so yeah stretchy clothes, sis. I did look like I ate a huge burrito so I was pretty lucky considering how fucking huge I thought my baby was. I packed my favorite socks and slippers to walk around in. The hospital did give me those socks with the rubber nubs on the bottom so you don’t fall. I ended up wearing those a lot. I packed a robe for after the delivery to wear around my room. Yo! This is important. Pack underwear (bras included). When my sister told me I needed underwear, I was like, uh duh. But she was like no bitch, not that lace cute shit you wear, GRANNY PANTIES. The hospital will give you these huge fucking pads. They’re the length of my forearm, not kidding. So you’re gonna need some reliable granny panties to hold those pads in place. Don’t worry about sexy underwear for like 2 months girl. Go ahead and pack them away.

Birthing Ball & Pump - Throughout my pregnancy I bounced on this huge birthing ball, which is just one of those stupid fitness balls you can get at Target. It’s supposed to help move the baby down and prepare you for labor. So I had to have it with me at the hospital. I made my husband blow it up when we first got it. He had to take the air out because it wouldn’t fit in our car, and then he had to blow it up again when I got to my delivery room. Poor man. But I was insistent on having it and I did use it while I labored. Where is it now…

Bluetooth speaker and charger & Phone chargers - Pregnancy brain is a real fucking thing guys and it’s super easy to forget the small things. My sweet husband told me many months later that he wasn’t sure if I had pregnancy brain or if I had always been that dumb and he was just realizing it (the answer is, a little bit of both). So don’t forget your fucking phone charger! Tyler was in charge of packing that stuff because I would’ve forgotten it. We brought a small bluetooth speaker because I wanted to listen to some music while I labored. Make a fun playlist or have your partner make one for you. I told Tyler the vibe I was going for and he put together the perfect playlist. Super dope. 

Snacks - Not for you prego, they’re for your partner. You can’t eat while you labor. I’m a bad girl though. I ate while I was waiting to go into a delivery room. We packed snacks that Tyler would like. Yeah there are vending machines so if you don’t want to bring snacks bring some cash money honey. Most vending machines accept cards now too but I don’t fucking know. I didn’t get anything for them. I asked my mom to bring Oatmeal Cream Pies so I could shove a few of those in my fat mouth before I couldn’t eat again. The reason you aren’t supposed to eat while you labor is just in case something happens and you have to have surgery. Also if you’re worried about shitting while giving birth, don’t even waste your energy thinking about it. You’re more than likely gonna shit, so come to terms with that sis, ain’t no point in stressing about that. 

Baby Clothes & Carseat - I brought the baby’s diaper bag. Dumb. Pack baby shit with your shit. You’ll need one outfit but you aren’t going to be able to decide so you’ll end up bringing like three. I brought a swaddle blanket, unnecessary. I didn’t even swaddle him in it. The hospital had him swaddled in one, which I should’ve taken! Carseat, duh! I hear the hospital won’t let you take the baby home if you don’t have a carseat installed so best get on that. 

Toiletries - Toothbrush, toothpaste, body wash and a washcloth. I thought about bringing makeup but I knew I wasn’t gonna put any on. I kept it simple and essentials only. The less you pack the more space you have to take shit from the hospital!

Birth Plan - I brought a birth plan that the hospital gave me a few months before my due date to fill out and I brought a hand written one, just in case. I never pulled it out. I was able to vocalize what I wanted and if I wasn't able to Tyler knew what I wanted. Make sure you go over your birth plan with your partner or doula or whoever is in the room with you. That way if anything happens and you're not able to speak for yourself, you have someone who can and something written down.

That's it! I started to pack my bag around 36 weeks because I knew I would be super indecisive. If you're like me and can't make up your mind for shit, I would start around that time too. Tyler packed his own bag with whatever he needed or wanted. Like I said, the less you pack the more space you have to take all the freaking diapers the hospital will give you. I had such a great staff at Kaiser on Sunset in LA. They gave me so many diapers, hats and cute little newborn shirts. The nurses also gave me these ugly mesh panties, a ton of pads, some spray shit for your cooter and a squirt bottle. I’ll go into detail about all that stuff later. I hope this helped you figure out what you’re gonna need when you pack your hospital bag. 

What about you mommas who already gave birth? What did you bring in your hospital bag? Did you forget anything?